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The Title: Water And A Blonde

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So, an extremely religious elderly blonde woman is sitting in her house during the third day of a tremondous, non-stop downpour of rain. Streets begin to flood, and before she knows it, she's tits deep in water. She prays to god to save her from the tremondous flood. A few hours later a boat full of people come by and ask the elderly blonde to jump in, "No my prayers and the will of my Lord will save me!" she says. The boat then goes away. A day passes, and now the elderly blonde is on the roof of her house, and there no sign of the rain stopping, or the flood receeding, so she prays again to God, "Lord, my savior, please save me from this flood." After her prayer another boat full of people come by and beckon her to jump aboard, she declines saying that once again, her lord and savior will surely save her from the flood. 5 hours pass since the last boat, and now the woman is on top of her chimney..she prays yet again, "Lord, I have been a good Christian woman, I know this flood is to punish the wicked, please oh Lord, I am no heathen, do not let me drown in this flood!" Then another boat comes along, and this time the people are more insistant on the woman jumping in, she declines. She ends up drowning, and going to heaven. When she meets her maker she asks, "God, why did you not save me? I've been a good Christian woman my entire life." To which god said, "Ok, listen, I sent the boat 3 fucking times!"




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Water And A Blonde

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